The art of practicing assertiveness is necessary on a daily basis effectively has “serious” side effects, especially for our health.
Few psychological dimensions are as necessary for our day-to-day as assertiveness is necessary, that is, as that exceptional ability to act and speak directly, honestly and appropriately, defending our rights, but also those of others.
It must be said, of course, that it is not easy. It is not because, often, our personality profile is accustomed to yield, to disguise what bothers us by not offending others, to say “yes” when we want a “no” …
Little by little, and without us noticing, we can reach a stage where frustration and discomfort leave their mark on our emotional health.
This translates into psychosomatic effects that give shape to headaches, digestive problems and that anxiety that takes away our sleep, motivation, and desire …
Practicing assertiveness is not just an art of personal balance, of coexistence and respect for oneself and others. We speak, first of all, of health.
Today in our space we want to explain 4 reasons why assertiveness is necessary to practice on a daily basis. We are sure that you will be very useful.
1. Assertiveness allows us to connect with our needs
We do not realize it, but there is a dimension in our behavior that steals our quality of life: we talk about our habit of always acting with the autopilot on.
- Letting ourselves be carried away by automatisms and routine means that many times we do not perceive certain things, certain internal needs, and evident realities.
- We have all gone through those times where we gave in excess. We assumed what others said without protesting. Moreover, without rethinking that certain things did not have to be this way.
- We were, for example, we who stayed a little longer after work. We who made a lifeline for the problems of that friend or those who offered that constant financial help for an interested brother …
These realities may have been very common in us at a time in our lives.
Until we took the step until we decided to act assertively to say “enough” and put our needs before respect and thus discover an unexpected well-being …
2. The lack of assertiveness leads sometimes too aggressive behavior
We often fall into the error of thinking that the person who lacks assertive skills is rather discreet, shy, weak and even vulnerable.
Actually, there is a detail that is important to keep in mind:
- The person who is unable to defend their rights, who does not know how to communicate effectively and who feels increasingly frustrated by this type of deficiencies, what accumulates every day is negativity and discomfort.
- This discomfort is almost like steam in a pressure cooker. Sooner or later he explodes and does it in the worst way, through spite, criticism, sarcasm and that contained anger that not everyone knows how to manage.
- Knowing how to defend ourselves with respect and intelligence, knowing how to communicate, negotiate and delimit spaces in the right way gives shape to a series of very healthy dynamics with which to feel good, in balance and harmony. Free from anger and anger…
3. We learn to be more present
Anyone who practices assertiveness knows that you should not leave tomorrow for the discomfort you feel today.
- If we have not liked how this co-worker has treated us, we will inform you immediately. If that decision of our boss seems unfair, we will let you know.
- Even more, also at the level of a couple, it is vital to practice the good art of assertiveness, because only in this way will we build a more integral relationship in which to clarify needs, where we can negotiate better and create more meaningful emotional spaces.
- All these practices encourage us to focus our attention on the present, in that here and now where those situations arise, before which we must respond effectively and safely.
- Something we usually do very often is to postpone that dialogue, is to shut up, is to say that “I will not give importance, I better shut up, better let it happen”.
However, if we look at the present with courage, determination, and assertiveness, we will give shape to a much more satisfying reality where we do not let anything happen, where we do not give in, do not keep quiet and do not give up.
4. Assertiveness allows us to have more honest relationships
Assertiveness has to do with honesty and integrity, with coherence in everything we do and say.
- These dimensions are like seeds that grow in our day to day more respectful relationships.
Because if there is something that should be clear is that assertiveness is not aggression, is not to make use of “truths that hurt.”
- Assertiveness offers us tools to see who I have in front of me as part of myself. Someone who deserves respect, someone who must respect me, two people who speak freely to strengthen a relationship.
All this gives us, without a doubt, a great inner peace, it helps us to go to bed with a clear conscience, since others know how we are, understand what we do not like, what we like and where we will never go.
We can not forget that social relations of quality are also based on the art of assertiveness and that all this is reflected in our well-being, in our happiness and, therefore, in our own health.